by / March 10th, 2017 /

Pissed Jeans – Why Love Now

 1/5 Rating

(Sub Pop)

After giving quiet consideration to calling their band Unrequited Hard On before eventually settling on Pissed Jeans nothing was ever quiet or considered for this hardcore band again. If Genghis Khan had the luxury of an iPod – okay maybe that’s a bit far-fetched – let’s say a Sony Discman as he galloped through Eurasia on his rampant Mongol Invasion he’d have been listening to Pissed Jeans.

Derogatory as that may sound for a band whose mission statement reads, “The idea was to start a different kind of punk band focused on dead-ended, carnal cravings, sexual depression…that sort of thing. Mainly we just wanted to bludgeon the listener with dull, monotonous droning rock music that just sucks energy out of you, the musical equivalent to watching a toilet flush”, it’s probably exactly what they’re going for – with a statement like that it’s a wonder they didn’t go into advertising.

Why Love Now could be played on loop in Guantanamo Bay. Never mind a toilet flushing, it’s the musical equivalent of hell. On opener ‘Waiting On My Horrible Warning’ the vocal sounds like Lemmy’s corpse has been infected with rabies, were the Motorhead front man around today he might consider telling the wet trousered ones to tone it down a bit. On ‘Ignorecam’ the line “It’s been five minutes, let’s make it ten”, makes you think ‘Oh fuck, please don’t’ as the nihilistic refrains of ‘Proud to be useless’ and ‘Ignore me’ suggest hugs were in short supply, perhaps the unrequited boners acted as protruding weapons of isolation upon which anyone offering even a semblance of comfort would immediately be impaled.

Why Love Now is a record that’s meant to provoke an emotion, its dense pounding darkness tries to evoke something in you without caring what it is. For some a record like this is an ideal way of venting – rage release – others would rather develop a severe case of haemorrhoids in their ears.

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