by / November 8th, 2010 /

100 Albums to Avoid: Top Story: 100 Albums to Avoid Before You Die #1: Poison – Open Up And Say Ahh!

The year was 1988 and over in Seattle, a band called Nirvana were releasing their debut single. The critics swooned. In the real world, however, no-one gave a damn, because Poison were back with their second, charmingly titled album.

In hindsight, though – hindsight in this case coming charging over the horizon within about 30 seconds – it was clear why the world needed Cobain & Co. Whereas Poison’s tiny-budgeted debut was not without its moments, Open Up… saw an increase in money, ego and (if the lyrics are anything to go by) copious amounts of shagging, but a decline in boring stuff like writing decent songs. It was dreadful, and yet it didn’t stop Poison enjoying brief mainstream success, prompted largely by the interminable ‘Every Rose Has Its Thorn’, written by Brett Michaels in a laundrette after a failed affair with an LA stripper.

Strangely though, ‘Nothin’ But A Good Time’ sounded oddly sweet when sung by the kids of The Greensborough Street Choir on the Xbox 360 ad.

Don’t download: ‘Love On The Rocks’.

If you hate this, don’t listen to: Warrant, Twisted Sister, late Kiss, Tigertailz.