by / November 29th, 2010 /

100 Albums to Avoid: Top Story: 100 Albums To Avoid Before You Die #3: Weezer – Make Believe

In the unlikely event that a prize was given to the band who managed best to alienate an adoring fanbase, then surely that prize belongs to Weezer. The slow, ugly, and bizarre process of attrition through which they flipped the bird to said fans is a breathtaking exercise in cynicism; and actually quite spectacular in a horrifying way.

The process was slow at first. The goodwill Weezer had earned as a result of their first two albums, the Blue Album’s harmonic monument to teen heartbreak and modern classic Pinkerton’s raw emo, dissipated slightly with disappointing but not terrible releases such as Maladroit and The Green Album. The fans still had reason to hope.

Then Weezer dropped the Make Believe bomb. A cynical nuke of such breath-taking stink it should have come with a scratch-and-sniff cover that released nappy odour. How many horrors does this album contain? We could say let us count the ways. But in truth, there are too many. How about a phoned-in cover of Joan Jett’s ‘I Love Rock’n’Roll’ with the hitherto unseen musical power to bring up people’s lunches? Not vile enough? Then try ‘We Are All On Drugs’ a bizarre and chundering cliché of a song which models itself on a child playground rhyme about, wait for it, diarrhea. Yes, you heard us, diarrhea. And that word, friends, pretty much sums up Weezer’s Make Believe in a messy nutshell.

Weirdly, it sold millions. Or maybe not weirdly. Cuomo’s a clever man, and the cynical betrayal of his fans with this reductive garbage must surely have come from having one eye on dumb videos by the reprehensible likes of Alien Ant Farm, and having one ear on the sound ‘kerr-ching!’

Don’t Download: We are all on Drugs

If you Hate this Don’t Listen to: Alien Ant Farm, Bowling For Soup

See more in this series: 100 Albums to Avoid.

  • Bang on the mark.

    Can see Weezer making an appearance again in this list with Rattitude. What happened to them?!